11.24.2010

Drowning deep in my sea of loathing...

I'm so tired of all of the fake bitches out there who think they're so cool by posting pix of them doing stupid shit on Facebook. Don't you know that what goes on Facebook stays on Facebook FOREVER? Your future schools, future employers, parents, future significant others' can look at that shit and see how fake and dumb you are? I'm especially tired of those girls who are completely straight but post pictures of them kissing other girls in a sexual way? That's okay if you're a pornstar, not if you're a regular person. You're giving females a bad name and you look trashy as shit. Also, it's kind of... oh idk, ILLEGAL to be smoking or drinking as a minor? Anyone who hates you enough could majorly fuck your life by showing the police pix of you with bottles of alcohol that YOU were dumb enough to take and post on Facebook-- a public website. Just saying.
I hate that people ENCOURAGE this behavior too! THIS PISSES ME OFF MORE THAN ANYTHING.
I seriously can't even describe how angry I am.

11.22.2010

Ke$ha never ceases to amaze me

November 22, 2010. Ke$ha's new album came out, and, well, it's amazing to say the least. One song in particular pulled one of my heart strings. The Harold Song...
(This is not an official video, it's fan-made)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKdKMlW-ykI


I Miss Your Soft Lips,
I Miss Your White Sheets.
I Miss The Scratch Of Your unShaved Face On My Cheek.
And this is so hard,
Cuz I didn't see,
That you were the love of my life and it kills me.
I see your face in, strangers on the street.
I still say your name when I'm talking in my sleep.
And in the limelight, I play it off fine.
But I can't handle it when I turn off my night light.

But I can't handle it when I turn off my night light.

They say that true love hurts,
Well this could almost kill me. Young love murdered,
That is what this must be.
I would give it all,
To not be sleeping alone.
The life is fading from me,
While you watch my heart bleed. Young love murdered, that is what this this must be.
And I would give is all,
To not be sleeping alone.

Remember the time we jumped the fence when the Stones were playing and we were to broke to get in.
You held my hand and they made me cry while
I swear to God that it was the best night of my life.
Or when you took me, across the world,
We promised this would last forever but now I see.
It was my past life.
A beautiful time.
Drunk off of nothing but each other till the sun rise. Drunk off of nothing but each other till the sun rise.

They say that true love hurts,
Well this could almost kill me. Young love murdered,
That is what this must be.
And I would give it all,
To not be sleeping alone.
The life is fading from me,
While you watch my heart bleed. Young love murdered,
That is what this this must be.
And I would give is all,
To not be sleeping alone.

It was the past life.
A beautiful time.
Drunk off of nothing but each other till the sun rise.

They say that true love hurts,
Well this could almost kill me. Young love murdered, that is what this must be.
And I would give it all, to not be sleeping alone. The life is fading from me, while you watch my heart bleed.
Young love murdered, that is what this this must be.
And I would give is all, to not be sleeping alone...





This song like... kills me. It... just kinda hurts to listen to, ya know? It's one of those songs that captures perfectly how I feel about my past, and even though I hadn't cried over this one thing in so so long, as soon as I heard the 30 second snipit of The Harold Song on iTunes, I was bawling. My reaction:
Tears streaming down my cheeks, eyes red and puffy, heart racing, mind racing, thinking "Holy shit, fuck you! How could you do this to me?"
Which brings me to another song, er, line of a song that I will go into another time...

Anyways, if anyone else feels this way about The Harold Song, please please let me know. If anyone else had a reaction such as mine, I wanna hear about it.

11.15.2010

Sidonie's Playlist (December 2010!)

Title: Grow A Pear
Artist: Ke$ha
Favorite Lyric: "And no... I don't wanna see your mangina..."

Title: Cannibal
Artist: Ke$ha
Favorite Lyric: "I think you're hot, I think you're cool, you're the kind of guy I'd stalk in school but now that I'm famous you're up my anus, NOW I'M GONNA EAT YOU FOOL! I eat boys up, breakfast and lunch, then when I'm thirsty I drink their blood, carnivore animal, I am a cannibal, I eat boys up... you better run..."

Title: 9 Crimes
Artist: Damien Rice
Favorite Lyric: "And is that all right? No..."

Title: Laughing With
Artist: Regina Spektor
Favorite Lyric: "God could be funny when told he'll give you money if you just pray the right way and when presented like a genie who does magic like Houdini or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus... God can be so hilarious..."

Title: Eet
Artist: Regina Spektor
Favorite Lyric: "It's like forgetting the words to your favorite song, you can't believe it, you were always singing along..."

Title: You Could Be Happy
Artist: Snow Patrol
Favorite Lyric: "You could be happy, I hope you are."

Title: Transatlanticism
Artist: Death Cab For Cutie
Favorite Lyric: "I need you so much closer..."

Title: Goodnight and Go
Artist: Imogen Heap
Favorite Lyric: (none that really stand out to me)

Title: We Intertwined
Artist: The Hush Sound
Favorite Lyric: "Carry a blanket, maybe a basket, but that's it. Innocence wasn't key, always locked up never free until you turned me..."

A Moment of Love Between a Laugh, a Kiss, a Cry to Right a Wrong... A Moment...

Sidonie Osborne
Ms. Souza
English I, Period 1
November 16, 2010


“As happens sometimes, a moment settled and hovered and remained for much more than a moment. And sound stopped and movement stopped for much, much more than a moment.” -Of Mice and Men, chapter 5

In 8th grade, every argument with a friend seems more extreme than it is in reality. At my middle school, every year during the spring, the entire class would take a trip to a different environmental camp for 5 days. This trip was called “Outdoor Education” or “Outdoor Ed.” for short. A few weeks before my 8th grade Outdoor Ed. trip to Catalina Island, my best friend, Kevin, and I had gotten into an argument. This argument would soon ruin our friendship, as well as my friendship with the vast majority of the boys in my class of 38 students. Looking back, Kevin and my argument was indeed serious, but during Outdoor Ed, it got out of hand, which led one of the most horrifying moments of my life.
Kevin and I had not spoken in weeks, and I was already miserable because of it. Losing your best friend is never easy especially if you know deep down that it is your fault. I couldn’t stop thinking about Kevin. He and I had been close for years, and it hurt me so much knowing that I had hurt him. On the third day of Outdoor Ed, during one of our free times, I was spending time with my female best friends in their cabin, when one of our other friends comes in.
“Sidonie,” she says, “Kevin told me to tell you he wanted to talk to you. I think he’s going to say he isn’t mad at you anymore.”
Naturally, since Kevin and I had not spoken since our fight, I got excited and nervous all at once. Helen, my current best friend, turned to me and asked if I wanted her to come with me.
“No,” I said. “I have to do this on my own.”
I headed out of their cabin alone and walked the 50 yards or so to the middle of the boys’ camp site and the girls’ camp site. I saw Kevin and a small group of other boys from our class whom had once been my friends walking from their camp site. When Kevin and I stood face to face, he told me to sit, so I did. We both sat on the grass, while the group of boys stood behind Kevin and watched. It seemed like forever before he finally said,
“So…”
“So,” I replied. “What did you want to talk about?”
“Sidonie, I want to be friends again. I miss you so much and can’t believe that we’re not friends anymore,” Kevin said, seemingly sincere, while some of the boys behind him snickered.
“Really?” I asked. Forever seemed to pass again and I watched Kevin pull grass out of the ground.
“No,” said Kevin. He then continued to stand up, scream profanities at me, and walk away with the group of boys, laughing hysterically as I sat there alone.
My face turned red, my heart was raced, my eyes swelled with tears. I couldn’t breathe and it felt like forever before I finally stood up and walked back to my friends’ cabin; red eyed and in hysterics. As soon as I pushed the fabric door away and my friends saw me, they rushed to my side and held me as I cried in their shoulders. They kept asking what had happened, but I couldn’t get the words out. I felt betrayed, as well as obvious sadness and regret.
For the next few hours, I cried in the comforting arms of my friends. I couldn’t believe what had happened, and for weeks after the incident, I was in denial about it. This was one of the most scarring days of my life so far, and even to this day it hurts to think about this moment that seemed to last forever. However, it is moments like this that build character and have made me who I am today.

11.07.2010

Talent

Katy Perry once said, "I believe that when talent meets preparation meets opportunity, you can breed success." I have so many friends (including myself) who have the talent and preparation part down, they just need the opportunity. I'm here to tell you all about my talented friends, and maybe if I feel like it, I'll post some of my talent on here sometime... I'll see. Anyways... here we go.

Name: Grace Wyman
How I know her: we went to elementary school together, and now we go to high school together
http://www.youtube.com/user/Gymnast29990

Name: Mbwana Blake
How I know him: we have history class together
http://www.youtube.com/user/BAYMAPPIN

Name: Point Of Interest
How I know them: we go to school together, the guitarist and the singer are my neighbors, I went to preschool with the bassist, I dated the drummer, and I'm just really close to the keyboardist. I'm also kinda their manager, so check them out.
http://www.youtube.com/user/POI2014
http://www.twitter.com/POI2014

Name: Mori Wexler
How I know him: best friends since 6th grade, we met at a dance
http://www.facebook.com/pages/RAM/189288837674

11.04.2010

Shawty ima tell you this once you the illest...

Actually, yes, I am the illest. I'm at home sick :P I also stayed home yesterday which totally sucks because now I'm going to have a crapload of homework to make up... Yay! Actually it's not that bad, it's more the Spanish test that I have on Friday (tomorrow) that I'm stressing about. *sigh* I really dislike that class... a lot. I like the people in it, but I hate the actual class. It's just really stressful.
Anyways, I was going through my old blog posts and thought that I hadn't had any new posts for November yet, so I decided to make one! I think in a minute I'm gonna turn on my computer (even though I'm lightweight terrified that my teachers are gonna be hella creepin' on me)... heehee :) alright, lots of love!